MERCURY:
Glowing in the golden candlelight
The freaks are all up in the middle of the night
Here's where the real freak show goes down
We got the funkiest funk in town

MERCURY KITTEN & BECKY:
And the freaks are assuming emergency powers
All through the ghostly suicide hours
Everybody ready to stay up late?
We'll shake you bake you and set you straight.

Cause we all awake round the hour of two
Gonna have a freaky good time.
Now the world's a fake and make believe is true
Gonna have a freaky good time.

MERCURY:
While Boy-O in his dreams was walking
BOY:
Thinking I was alone
BECKY:
We were sitting in a circle talking
BOY:
Whoever could have known?
MERCURY:
Now Kitty came up with the master plan
BOY:
Well thank you Kitty I’m most impressed
MERCURY KITTEN & BECKY:
But we all pitched in and lent a hand
BOY:
I’m grateful beyond what words can express!

CAST:
Just stop – stop – stop – stop –just stop and listen!
Listen to Kitty speak.
You gotta stop – stop – stop – stop –just stop and listen!
Listen to Kitty speak.

KITTEN:
Well….
I know a closet on the second floor
Where there is hidden a little secret door
And that door leads you to a steep staircase
Spiralling down into a deep dreamy place
We gotta go down down down down to the lonely black
Gotta find the land of the dead, and get your pretty little girlfriend back!

CAST:
Cause we all awake round the hour of two

KITTEN: Never you mind the wherefore or when

CAST:
Now the world's a fake and make believe is true

KITTEN:
Gonna put that boy together again.

BOY:
It sounds pretty good – but how do I know
The land of the dead is where these secret stairs go?

KITTEN:
Well – oh – Doctor!

CAST:
Doctor!
What are you doing up?
We were just…ah….
Er….that is….

DR. Ü:
Guten nacht everybody. It’s nice to see you. Oh, don’t worry about me, really. Keep the music going. It’s a wonderful piece.

CAST:
Uh, OK….he wants to keep the music going….

DR. Ü:
I’ve got a secret I bet nobody knows
All these years and no one’s got a clue
Although I like to strike a professorial pose
The truth is I’m just a loony as you! (OOH! HUH!)
Yes you may murmur (MURMUR!) and you may gasp (GASP!)
I’m an unbalanced medical man (MAN!)
I’ve got the solution and it’s simple to grasp
So let’s continue this ludicrous plan.

Now, the little matter of the stairs….
Since we’re all delusional anyway
Why not simply hypothesize,
Postulate the stairs to go wherever we say?

CAST:
Yeah!
We’re all crazy anyway!
The stairs go wherever we say!
We’re all crazy anyway!
The stairs go wherever we say!

MERCURY:
Boy, you’re a rock star again so let’s get you dressed
To meet the King Of The Dead, you got to look your best.

DR. Ü:
Now after my confession
I’ve only got one thing to say
In my favorite English expression
I think it’s time to “PARTAY”!

CAST:
Partay! Partay! Partay! Woo!
Partay! Partay!
Zip zip zakalaka li lay!
Partay! Partay! Woo!
Partay! Partay!
Zip zip zakalaka li lay!
Partay! Partay! Woo!

BOY:
We’re gonna go down down down down

MERCURY:
Down to the lonely black

BOY & MERCURY:
Gonna find the land of the dead, and get that pretty little girlfriend back

CAST:
Everyone get in single file
Marching on down the hall
Light a candle those stairs are steep
No fear now people stand tall

DR. Ü:
Let’s put a blindfold on the Boy now.
There are things down there too horrible for him to see.